Quotations
Famous Quotations
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Jack Handy Quotes
«If you're a young Mafia gangster out on your first date, I bet it's real embarrassing if someone tries to kill you.»
«I'd rather be rich than stupid.»
Author: Jack Handy
(Writer)
«I wish a robot would get elected president. That way, when he came to town, we could all take a shot at him and not feel too bad.»
«I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it. - Deep Thoughts (Saturday Night Live)»
Author: Jack Handy
(Writer)
«If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet you could shoot beer out of you nose.»
Author: Jack Handy
(Writer)
«If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic.»
Author: Jack Handy
(Writer)
«Instead of trying to build newer and bigger weapons of destruction, we should be thinking about getting more use out of the ones we already have.»
Author: Jack Handy
(Writer)
«Al brings a wealth of experience to Financial Network. His depth of experience with a variety of securities organizations can only help us improve our already strong compliance culture.»
Author: Jack Handy
(Writer)