The Eight O'clock News...

The ruckus all happened so quickly. The worlds cartoon characters started jumping out of TV screens, magazines, newspapers and all other forms of animation to compete with the real world. There have been many bizarre events today that made the news headlines concerning these loony characters. Firstly, we've heard horrible news that Jerry has killed Tom. After many years of head lumps and broken teeth, a 140-kilogram anvil finally did the trick. Jerry was delighted …

…in Paris. The strange character clocked a superhuman time of 4,32 seconds, smashing Michael Torino's previous record of 8,93 seconds. "I worked so hard with my preparations the whole year, and wasn't even able to compete." Cried a teary Torino. <Tab/> Well that's all we have for the news tonight. I'm sure we will have more astounding breaking news as long as these corny cartoon characters keep catapulting out of their worlds. Goodnight!